rant all u want

S.N.H by short
Siti Nur Hazilawani in full
Juz turned Double 2 :)
Dancing & Grooving have always been her thing
Hopes that everything will be alright for the years to come

babyu knowhow i feelabout u ;)

halfdone chair design for competitn

i create ma 3d name in rhino!coolioz!

our slepi faces kene patah lik skola

nice sky colors with a star..spot d star!

so not me wif long hair la

me wif fify's cat!!suke kuching die

ma lil bro wif d rez of ma cuzzies

i want tiz!!whu wana buy for me??lol..ade orange seh ma fav color!!

ni fifynye keje selitkan mentos to ma suspender!thx eh

mencuci di masjid jamek queenstown :)

fify long hair look

fathin long hair look..huahuahua

Rez of d pix go to --> (http://s8.photobucket.com/albums/a10/ctnur/masjidbotanicgardensrandompix/) thank u :)

+i lazy to upload pix coz therez alot la so go check out at ma album oritez..tknk sudah n if nk kutuk2 gi mampuz ah
+juz a brief of d paz few days im having...last sat basically went to do some gd deeds goin to masjid jamek queenstown at redhill to wash n clean up d masjid togeda wif ros n i didnt celebrate national dae bt instead slpover at fify houz ;)we shall do it again bebz!
+sun nutin interesting...mon to thurs basically 9am to 6pm skulin includin 2moro..like wth..da mcm werkin full time seh..n im super tired seriously juz bcoz we all haf to enter the furniture design competition..sheesh
+tu pun ma chair lil bit more to go n therez posibilities of comin back again nxt wk 9 to 6 again..damn la..if not i'll be enjoyin ma skul holidae of 2mths la thx eh
+i will remember wat d makcik said at d masjid "20yrs old is not old yet..u r consider old wen ur age is 23 coz tat is wen u experience more stuffs n ppl attitudes..so do watever u want now b4 u reach 23 ok"..bcoz we were sayin we r goin to b old nxt yr..lol..thx ye makcik
+n todae sean join ma clique for lunch n gif tiz long grandfather story..lol..about emotional intimacy n physical intimacy..haha..yes we appreciate sean for ur advice aso bt relationship n guys we noe u care bt us :)
+hmm tink bcoz he notices each of us change lately..yes i will be always dreamy,lookin sad n stoning,yg lg due tu da ke babak lain..lol n d another two hmm mia kot..lol
+n having claz now frm mornz to late afternoon is like we having picnic la..lol
+i want ma rez n slp pretti plz..!thx claz for helpin me out foldin ma 200 plus papers!lurve u oinkiez!:)
+hmm including todae i duno how many times i read it aredi tho i dun wana look at it bt u noe ma hands itchy n ma eyes always wana look..haixx
+seeing sumtin juz now was well suspected..lotz of sacrifice has been done n one of it which i will nt forget bcoz d scar is stil there on ma left shoulder tho itz been quite awhilen another scar in ma heart for life
+and tiz will be my last post for the moment..i will b mia for long time for now..i dun wish to update animore tho i lurve u ma bloggie bt i decided to lay off now..n i mite b changin ma hp no too n oni certain ppl wil noe..yes i noe its a drastic ting to do..hmmm..tatz d reason y im writing a long post
+tho few mths had paz bt im not like "woohoo!!ive move on!!"..tatz nt me..all tiz while ive been puttin on a mask so others wont fel wat im feelin n facin coz i want u guys to be happi..bt went therez no one around tatz wen i took off ma mask n let it all out..n now more probz kp addin up..more heartz to b broken..yes bcoz of u im like tiz...
+ eh dun act lah..jgn nk step pat sini..leh gi mampuz k seriously..prangai meluatkan..3 fingers up ur arse ok
+im glad we haf our dirty talks gerlz oink2..and our secret is between we all oni ok..sumhow those talks makes me laugh out loud
+werds for d week.."steam kering??".."aku tk tahan"..hahaha.."chiko??"..those funi moments using tiz werds..thx gerlz;)
+HAPI BDAE DEAR OINK2 PEA!!bdae kiz for u 2moro yar lol


Todae will be my laz moments of writin in tiz diary of mine
Therez nutin great to talk abt my life no more...
Days,mths,yrs n then gone nutin wil be heard animore
Only for a start it seems gd bt as d time pass by it seems rather useless
Everydae more secrets are to fill up in ma heart and some are confidential
Tatz wat i am..a secretive person which im train since im young
I cant be bothered at times
Cause oni GOD knows what im feelin and how much suffer i wen thru
Im not seekin any revenge or anitin
Cause i noe wat goes around comes around
And let HIM do all the work and it mite not be now
Can be later or even in the future
All i nd to do is juz pray,hope n express evrytin out towards d laz moments
Of course i will be hurt thru out ma life
What ppl sae is easy bt wat d person himself/herself goin thru it is much more harder than u noe
"what if u were in my shoes...?"
And i admit im not a strong person bt rather a weak person coz tatz wat i am
U cant simply judge a person by juz a dae
A changing person needs time to make themselves better
Acceptance n patience is d key no matter what
Not by juz chucking d problem to one side and making a new one
From there u will noe how much tat person treasure sumone n lurve them whole heartedly
Izzit so easy to do such things??
Thru out ma yrs ive been sacrificing alot for others n not for myself
Cause im a forgiving person n want others to be happy rather than making myself happy
Bt at times i qst maself 'does d other party noes it?'
Maybe tatz d reason y im becoming hurtful than ever
Digging into my own grave tearing up for sumting tat i could not stand up for my rights and letting it juz go away
There u will noe "mane satu yg permata dan mane satu yg kaca"
There will be others who will "api2 kan" and oni the gd ones will ask to stay
The ones whu backstab r d ones who is juz jealous n finding trouble
U rather break many hearts rather than juz 1 heart
Sumtimes wen we r angry doesnt mean we hate tat person bt out of lurve
Mungkin ni hari harimu...esok akan menjadi hariku
And im not at the losing end bcoz tiz is d beginning
Beginning of evrytin
And how u cld be proud of tat
Dun u ever feel guilty??
Itz gd to noe how sick u can be by doin tat
Itz easy to talk it out but doin it personally u fail
Tiz applies to B"4"
I dun care animore n y shld i care
Living in world full of fakes
I nvr make maself happi n tiz is d time when i should turn d tables around
Doing tings right shoot those rundown by lorry faces
Getting away like bunch of pigs happily
There will be a my day when i crush u pplz into bitz of biscuits till dust


My decision will affect some ppl
Cause i wana run away like the wind
Where at one point u will see me and a minute later im gone
Flying away following the flow of the wind wherever it brings me
And all those things ive done wif u tat no one has done it
I want u to remember and miss it
There will be alot of qsts that i wana noe which i cldnt ans it for myself
Mata tidak boleh menipu walaupun ape jua
Doesnt mean a person haf to sae lurve evrydae but the actions will prove it
Whatever u say is true and not a piece of lie
Itz hard for me now and the best way is for me to be gone from evryting
Doing evryting i can before i close my eyes forever from this world
Forgiveness depends how fast i heal from evryting
And i will remember sumone saying to me " y u shld let go the person u lurve to anione or juz like that??"
Evryting happens for a reason n if tat reason u cld change it it wouldnt haf happen
Unless u wish it to happen
Im not going to hope for anithing
Hoping for sumtin will oni makes me disappointed in the end
Looking forward too is not in my list
My heart has been damaged which is beyond repair
And i will start writing to u back again when my heart is open back again
Concentrate on what you doing now
All d things u said tat u wana do wif me
Only becomes in my drms wen i shut my eyes
And pray that i will still be alive when im back from touring around aimlessly
I lurve evry single bits of my memories
Never in my life i wana delete it away
There a lot of things ppl duno bt me
Alot of things i wana speak out n share
But gt no chance to do so..



LOVES AND HUGS
PEACE OUT

"Do u still remember wat ma mum advice for u n ma bro..?" back to top?